Apparently in April, Manchester Orchestra released a live album from a show last year where they played their 2014 album Cope front-to-back. I was playing it within 30 seconds of discovering it existed this morning. It’s excellent. I’m so happy it exists.

About 3 minutes into the first track (Top Notch), as lead-singer Andy Hull sings the words “give up,” which are drawn out in the song to be a sort of “give uoooooooouuuuooouuup” sound, the crowd joins in at their top of their lungs. Hundreds of people singing the same notes in that rock show ecstatic unison that is so beautiful to experience.

I spent part of morning driving around on errands and I had the windows down, the volume at top notch. I screamed along to every song and remembered the only time I’ve seen Manchester Orchestra play, in 2022 at the Ryman in Nashville. The Ryman is an incredible venue but not exactly great for headbanging and dancing—which did not stop me but did diminish my rowdiness. As I drove, and screamed, and air drummed, and repeated songs I felt a little grief come up.

I don’t really go to shows anymore. Chattanooga is not a popular stop for the artists I love (shout out to the big exception The Mountain Goats), and it is rarely worth the exorbitant ticket costs + hotel + driving time to go see shows in Nashville or Atlanta. So live music has become a much less prevalent thing in my life since 2020.

So it goes, I guess. But today’s stumbling upon a live album I didn’t know was available made me remember all the good shows I’ve seen, and all the joy I’ve felt dancing my ass off and jumping and screaming along to songs I deeply love. I may not currently been in an era of live music, but it has meant so much to me and I guess that’ll do.